WEDDING

Should I Propose Before or After Dinner? – What to Consider

Should I Propose Before or After Dinner?

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When it comes to proposing marriage, there are many different ways to go about it. Some people choose to do it before dinner, while others wait until after the main course has been served. So, which is the right way for you? There are several things to consider when making this decision.  

There’s no right or wrong answer to this question – it all depends on your specific situation. If you’re wondering whether it’s better to propose before or after dinner, read on for some tips that might help you make a decision! 

In this blog post, we will discuss the pros and cons of both proposals and help you decide which one is best for you! 

Why Does the Time Matter When You Propose? 

secret wedding proposal

The main reason why the time of your proposal matters is that it can set the tone for the rest of your evening. If you propose before dinner, it might be a more intimate and private moment between the two of you. Alternatively, if you wait until after dinner to pop the question, it could be a fun and festive way to end your meal! 

The time you choose to propose is critical as you would want to make sure that your partner is available and not preoccupied with other things. 

You would also want to ensure that you have enough time to properly speak with your partner about the proposal, as well as answer any questions they may have. Dinner time is considered to be an ideal time to drop the question, as it has you and your partner in a relaxed setting where you can chat and enjoy each other’s company. 

Another consideration is whether or not you want your proposal to be a surprise. If you’re planning on surprising your partner with a proposal, it’s important to note that this could potentially backfire if you do it before dinner. This is because your partner may need some time to digest the news and may not be able to focus on eating their meal. 

On the other hand, if you’re okay with your partner knowing about the proposal in advance, proposing before dinner could give them something to look forward to during the meal! 

 
Here’s how former president Barack Obama proposed, as Michelle Obama recounts in her book Becoming. 

“As we were reaching the end of the meal, Barack smiled at me and raised the subject of marriage. He reached for my hand and said that as much as he loved me with his whole being, he still didn’t really see the point… 

“Instantly, I felt the blood rise in my cheeks… Really? We were going to do this now? Eventually, our waiter came around holding a dessert plate, covered by a silver lid. He slid it in front of me and lifted the cover. I was almost too miffed to even look down, but when I did, I saw a dark velvet box where the chocolate cake was supposed to be. Inside was a diamond ring… 

“Barack looked at me playfully. He’d baited me. It had all been a ruse. It took me a second to dismantle my anger and slide into joyful shock… He’d riled me up because this was the very last time he would invoke his inane marriage argument, ever again, as long as we both should live.” 

Where Do You Want to Propose? 

wedding proposal at home

Another important factor to consider is where you want to propose. If you’re hoping for a more intimate and private proposal, doing it in your home might be the way to go. This is because your home is likely a place where you and your partner feel most comfortable and relaxed. 

Alternatively, if you’re hoping for a more public and grandiose proposal, doing it at a restaurant or in a public park could be the way to go. This is because these locations can provide an element of surprise and make the proposal even more special. Moreover, you can have friends and family come over to celebrate the occasion with you! 

It’s also important to consider the logistics of where you want to propose. For example, if you’re planning on proposing at home, making sure that your house is clean and presentable before your partner arrives can be crucial. Alternatively, if you’re planning on proposing in a public place, making sure that you have a backup plan in case the weather isn’t cooperative can be key. 

Of course, you can always propose in a more unique and personal location that has meaning to you and your partner. This could be somewhere like where you had your first date, where you went on your first vacation together, or even where you got engaged! 

The bottom line is that there’s no wrong answer when it comes to deciding when and where to propose. It all comes down to what would be most meaningful for you and your partner. 

Pros of Proposing Before Dinner 

There are several pros to proposing before dinner. 

  • First, it can be a more intimate and private moment between the two of you. This is because you won’t have to worry about being interrupted by waiters or other people at the restaurant. 
  • Second, proposing before dinner gives you more time to speak with your partner about the proposal. This is important because you’ll want to make sure that your partner is on board with the idea and that they understand what they’re getting themselves into! 
  • Third, it can be a fun way to start off your evening together. Your partner will likely be in a good mood after hearing your proposal, which could make for a more enjoyable dining experience! 
  • Fourth, if you’re hoping to keep the proposal a surprise, proposing before dinner gives you more control over the situation. This is because you can ensure that your partner is available and not preoccupied with other things. 
  • Finally, proposing before dinner can be less stressful than doing it during or after the meal. This is because you won’t have to worry about getting food on the ring or dropping it in front of everyone at the restaurant! 

Pros of Proposing After Dinner 

There are several pros to proposing after dinner. 

  • First, your partner will likely be in a good mood after having a nice meal. This could make them more receptive to the idea of getting engaged! 
  • Second, if you’re hoping to keep the proposal a surprise, proposing after dinner gives you more time to plan and execute your plan. This is because your partner will likely be occupied with eating their meal and won’t be expecting a proposal. 
  • Third, proposing after dinner gives you more time to speak with your family and friends about the proposal. This is important because you’ll want to make sure that everyone is on board with the idea before you pop the question! 
  • Fourth, it can be a fun way to end your evening together. Your partner will likely be in a good mood after hearing your proposal, which could make for a more enjoyable evening! 
  • Finally, you can get everyone involved, from the waiter who brings the ring in a champagne glass to the people at the next table over. This could make for a more memorable and special proposal! 

What are the Cons of Proposing During Dinner? 

dinner wedding proposal

There are several cons to proposing during dinner. 

  • First, it can be a more stressful and chaotic experience. This is because you’ll have to worry about getting food on the ring or dropping it in front of everyone at the restaurant! 
  • Second, if you’re hoping to keep the proposal a surprise, proposing during dinner can be more difficult to control. This is because your partner will likely be occupied with eating their meal and may not be expecting a proposal. 
  • Third, proposing during dinner can take away from the intimate and private moment between the two of you. This is because you’ll have to worry about being interrupted by waiters or other people at the restaurant. 
  • Fourth, it can be a less enjoyable dining experience for both you and your partner. This is because the proposal may cause some stress or tension between the two of you. 
  • Finally, proposing during dinner can be more expensive than doing it before or after the meal. This is because you’ll have to pay for the ring, the champagne, and the dinner all at once! 

Wrapping Up 

So, should you propose before or after dinner? There are pros and cons to both options. Ultimately, it depends on what you’re hoping to accomplish with your proposal. If you’re looking for a more intimate and private moment, proposing before dinner may be the best option. However, if you’re hoping to get everyone involved and make it a more memorable experience, proposing after dinner may be the way to go! 

Related Articles:

How to Propose to a Boyfriend (And What to Expect)

Proposing Without a Ring – Creative Alternatives

Proposing with a Temporary Ring – How to Do It Right

How to Propose to Your Bridesmaids